Many leaders take pride in being the person everybody depends on. It sometimes feels like a badge of honor. When the phone rings in the middle of family dinner, they pretend to be annoyed, yet secretly feel a sense of pride for being badly needed to solve a problem.
Every leader wants to be valued.
They want to be needed.
And whether you admit it or not, you know it feels good to be the hero.
But there comes a point when being needed most of the time and even for the smallest of things, can become more of a liability than a strength.
Here’s how it can be damaging…
Being the go-to person for everything and having to attend to so many things can lead to leadership burnout.
Being too involved in the smallest operational or tactical details (especially if you’re a middle/senior manager) can make you lose your focus on what really matters like strategy and growth.
Deciding and doing everything for your team translates to lesser opportunity for them to learn and grow.
Decision making and implementation will be slower because of the bottleneck created by needing a specific leader to decide or approve.
So how can you turn your Leadership Style from a liability to an asset?
Shift from Leadership Hero to Enabler of Talent
One sign of mature leaders is the becoming less central to daily operations. You won’t often see them meddling with every small detail, not because they’re detached or they don’t care, but because they trust those who are doing the work.
Instead of being the hero who saves the team from their challenges or mistakes, be an enabler of talent.
Learn coaching skills so you know how you can shift your conversations from telling to co-creating.
Get to know what your team’s individual strengths and capabilities are and actively support them in their career development.
Resist the urge to quickly jump in with your opinion and solution
Revisit and Recalibrate your Ways of Working as a Leader
To make new habits take root and grow, the environment must also be set up and primed for success. This means looking at how you operate on a daily basis as a leader.
Here’s a guide for your reflection:
Which activities take most of my time unnecessarily? Is there anyone else who can take on the work now or in the future?
What decisions could (or should) my team make without me?
If I would take a break (with no connectivity) for two weeks, what activities or processes might stop or slow down?
Who in my team shows potential and/or willingness for an expanded scope?
What could be hindering me from trusting my team? What can I do to build trust?
After answering these questions, define new habits and design a new system on how you would like to show up and do things moving forward.
Ready to let go?
Letting go is never easy.
Sounds like a line from a love song, huh?
Well that applies to leadership as well. Letting go can sometimes feel like losing authority and control. Or it may also feel irresponsible.
The opposite is actually true.
Letting go is a sign of a strong, confident and mature leadership. It means you are not just anchoring your leadership on your position or power, but something stronger – relationships built on trust.
If you need help in unpacking and exploring what fears and hesitations are making you hold tight to your need to be needed, then maybe it’s time to talk to a professional coach.
No Special tools needed. You can start today, and do it consistently to make a difference. Coach Kurly de Guzman is a Career and Leadership Coach and one of a LinkedIn’s Top Voice based in the Philippines. She continuously seeks ways to help coaches, leaders and teams thrive through her newsletter, leadership and career development workshops as well as group and 1:1 coaching session for clients.
