It’s easy to see leadership as a position of power and prestige. While that may be true, the other side of the coin tells different stories. These stories are those I hear from leaders who express their vulnerabilities behind closed doors whether in coaching sessions or in meetings where we design customized programs for their needs. Other stories are my own, from the internal battles I face as a leader myself.
Leadership is not a rank or position to be attained. Leadership is a service to be given – Simon Sinek
Leadership has its perks, whether you’re in a corporate management position or working in a non-profit. Popularity, fame, prestige, extra pay, parking space, medical benefits, first dibs, instant influence, a car, and yes, including the opportunity to work with an executive or leadership coach. Oftentimes, these perks are all outsiders see, especially if they paint a picture of leadership based on what is seen on our bosses social media posts – fancy dinner with clients, frequent business travels, the latest gadgets or bags. What they do not see is what’s happening behind the scenes.
😴 Sleepless nights worrying about how to break the news of the redundancy and retrenchment to the team.
😢 A child feeling hurt because Papa missed her first ballet recital due to an important management meeting.
💼 Early mornings and late nights spent catching up on work deadlines, project deliverables or homework in the leadership course they’re attending as part of their development plan.
📩 The anxiety upon opening email on a Monday morning, or your phone ringing on the way home and seeing the CEO’s name on the caller ID.
💔 Forcing a smile on your face or gentle words to come out of your mouth even when you’re down and broken, because you feel that no matter what you do, people will talk about you and will take it against you.
No wonder some mid-career professionals and high performers tell me that they’d rather not take the managerial path or the leadership route.
For those who have chosen this road less traveled, I salute you! Please know that even if sometimes you feel you are alone and your efforts are invisible to others, you are valued, appreciated, and needed. More importantly, you are growing to be a better version of yourself everyday.
I put together these 3 affirmations and reflections which have helped me and other leaders I worked with. My hope is that these will carry you through the storms to the rainbows.
I am human
You might feel like you’re carrying the weight of the world on your shoulders with your whole team (or the whole organization) counting on you. But beneath the superpowers and super strength you have, also remind yourself that you are human. Give yourself the permission to feel overwhelmed, to cry, to make mistakes and to ask for help. You are not perfect and you don’t have to be.
What are my wins today?
You can easily get trapped in the rabbit hole of regret or self-criticism, especially when you or others think that you have fallen short of expectations.
I shouldn’t have said that.
I should have added more details to the presentation.
I made the wrong decision and they all hate me.
Though you may have areas to improve on, also remember to recognize and celebrate your wins no matter how big or small they may be.
Approached your staff to recognize him for exceeding sales targets? That’s a win!
Zero unread mails by lunch time? That’s a win!
Shared your ideas during the meeting? That’s a win too!
“If you can get 1 percent better each day for one year, you’ll end up thirty-seven times better by the time you’re done.” – James Clear
I am growing everyday
When you acknowledge that you are human and imperfect, you are also acknowledging that you are a work-in-progress. You recognize that celebrating your progress can co-exist with continuously improving yourself. This mindset is your key to being curious, open to change and excited for what will unfold.
I’ve said this before, and I will say it again.
Your career is an evolving masterpiece.
So are you. 🙂
You got this, Dear Leader!
In our lives and careers, there will always be challenges and setbacks that happen behind the scenes, no matter what path you take. This is what stretches us and nurtures our growth. The key to thriving lies within you.
No Special tools needed. You can start today, and do it consistently to make a difference. Coach Kurly de Guzman is a Career and Leadership Coach and one of a LinkedIn’s Top Voice based in the Philippines. She continuously seeks ways to help coaches, leaders and teams thrive through her newsletter, leadership and career development workshops as well as group and 1:1 coaching session for clients.
To work with Kurly, send an email to hello@kurlydeguzman.com or book an exploratory call to discuss your organization’s needs her
